12 January, 2009

Spastic of the week

I know it's only Monday, but I think we will have trouble beating this one for stupidity. I have had a package delivered to work with Kitchen goodies in it. (I get my packages delivered to work, because my postman is extremely unreliable and this way I don't have to try and get to my local post office in business hours.) In the package is a couple of spoons, a backing stone, knife rack and a knife. The knife seem to have caused a security alert. Perhaps not unreasonable on the surface, but when you think every kitchen in the building would have a knife, even if only for birthday cake cutting, maybe a touch over kill.

Anyway, the upshot is that I can only pick up my package on the way OUT of the building this evening. I think this whole episode is proof positive that yes, our security guards did used to work at a prison (this is a rumour that has been circulating for a while) and that that are still in the prison mind set.

P.S. No I am not a knife wielding maniac!


Anonymous said...

I, for one, am tankful to our hard working security Nazi's for foiling this attempted terrorist attack on our building.

This clear evidence that we need to really ramp up our security measures and we need to respond to the terrorists in kind, to send a clear message: We will not live in fear. We will not tolerate this behaviour. WE WILL FIGHT BACK!!

Firstly we must fortify our location:
I propose (propose means will do this without any consultation or regard for other opinions) the creation of a new, stronger and more powerful security team to increase the safety of our building.

This team will have the use of metal detectors in the foyer, bag search X-Ray Machines and and sniffer attack dogs.

They will have the power to conduct random strip and cavity searchs, and to arrest any potential threats as percieved by them.

They will be able to and detain prisoners for as long as required to question, torture and then pose for humilitating and disturbing photos with the prisoners for posting on facebook.

Secondly, this attempted attack is more than enough evidence to convince the world that Parks Vic (the obvious perputrators)are now holding WMD's. We must act immediately. All able staff are to take up arms and join in the attack and invasion of the Parks Vic buildings across the state.

If we get a turn out as strong as we do for Fire Duty, I exepct an enourmas Army of say 5-6 people will actually turn up.

The battle shouldn't take long, be done in a couple of hours. In & out in no time, the local popoualtion will be thankful and brand us as heros!

Let us fight this evil threat together. Today we protect our homes, tomorrow we take all the OIL!

beesknees said...

well, just use of the first word in the title of your post would cause an alert here. You should see the stuff we get from the Equity office

Gibscot said...

Thanks for the good chuckle! Doesn't this make you feel safer? Keep your knife handy just in case...I used to keep an old Audie Murphy pocket knife my grandfather gave me when I was 12 in my purse but it was confiscated at the airport. Nice to know the US employs thieves in Homeland/Transportation Security...really makes me feel safe!